How To Deal With A Roommate In A Funny Way


1) Don’t ask your roommate when he will wash his dirty dishes. Wash them for him. Then tell him he owes you.

2) My roommate didn’t wash his dirty dishes for three days. Then he finally said: “I will wash them tomorrow.” I said: “Don’t worry about it. I’m hoping to see some cockroaches. Haven’t seen them for a long time.”

3) Don’t ask your roommate if he will split an electricity bill with you. Break his iPhone. Then tell him his iPhone has paid its own electricity bill.

4) Don’t tell your roommate you have parents. Tell him you’re part of Russian mafia. This way he will be very polite with you.

5) Don’t tell your roommate to keep the bathroom clean. Tell him you would shit in his bed if he forgets to flush the toilet.

6) Don’t tell your roommate not to bring home stray pets. Kill a stray dog and put it in his bed, Godfather-style.

7) Don’t tell your roommate not to slam the door in the middle of the night. Slam the door in the middle of the night, then tell him he did it.

Sponsored Content

Liked this page?

Then why not get our iOS app from ? Then you will have the world's biggest collection of jokes and inspiring quotes right in your pocket, and the app will work faster than the site, so it will save you time and keep you entertained.

Share the joy

Related pages

mighty python and the holy grail quotesjack kerouac quotes on the roadjokes about math teachersbus driver billy madisoncivil engineer jokesbest comedy movies in the worldgandhi quotes animalsfamous rodeo quotesfrederick douglas educationpicture of john boehnerpoems of mary oliverkevin hart quoteanswers of riddlesfunny bowlersyou re ugly comebacksturtles jokesquotes about tupac shakurkevin hart transcriptwhat is frederick douglass famous forbubba gump shrimp forrest gump quotestrucker jokes dirtyjohn mayer burning room lyricsmelodie beattiechico scarfacefunny scottish jokesshort funny engineering jokesfunny cheerleading quotesfunny lines from napoleon dynamiteisaac newton speechjohn lennon dreamer quoteuntouchables quotesbest comebacks for insultsbuddha gautama quotesghost jokes for adultsyour moma jocksfunny rap one linershuck finn quotesbreakdancing quotesbowling motivational quotesstephen colbert hampden sydneytom cruise tropichumorous blogsthomas edison jokescaddyshack carl spackler quotesthomas edison quote about failurefunniest quick jokes everuplifting poem for a friendfunny husband wife cartoonspointless jokes that make you laughcarl spackler quotescool redneck stufftom cruz tropic thundercatcher in the rye phrasesfunny kevin hart clipsfunny foot punsfunny redneck linesstein quotesbrainy quotes appapple fruit jokesforest gump famous quotesyo momma so ugly jokeszach guilfordfunny codependency quotesnapoleon dynamite freakin idiotsocrates youth quotefamous quotes from the beatlesnapolean dynamite tinafunny patient jokespictures of niggaspictures of monkey peniskevin hart teacher jokescarface quoteschris rock funniest movieshonda dealership complaints